Seeing Things Differently

Once I started to realize everything is just personal preference, perspective, and opinions, things started to mak sense. We start off as a blank slate (infant stage), and as we grow things are implanted in us. But around toddle stage is where we start to come into ourselves and able to express our likes and dislikes. That's when we are challenged on our beliefs for ourselves. That's when our parents start to tell us what's socially appropriate to make us acceptable to others and push their beliefs on us. What would have happened if our parents didn't push us into society's ways and let us live our lives in a way that made us happy wihtin ourselves? I am sure there would be less push back and there would be less depression and anxiety in children as they started to mix and mingle with others. If parents supported their kids and didn't try to tell them what's best for them to save face from others, kids wouldn't be as hard to raise as they appear. Think about it. If your child is happy within themselves, they have nothing but positivity to project outwards. They would be able to express themselves without worry or concern of how others view them. They would be secure in themselves. If parents didn't project their past experiences on their kids, more kids would be happy go lucky, living a carefree life as an induvial and not trying to fit in where they are truly uncomfortable. 

Adults get to a certain age where we finally let go and just say fuck it and do our own thing, (as we did as a child). And once you realize what that thing is, more than likely it's something you always wanted to do when you were younger but couldn't or didn't because of the influence from others. I know being alone was nothing to me. It gave me a chance to listen to what was within me and make decisions that only impacted my life in a positive way. But because of my parents, it wasn't until I was pushed out of my safe space that I started trying to "fit into" a space that wasn't for me. I started doing things that wasn't of my true self. And no matter how hard I tried it never worked out. But now I know it's because it wasn't supposed to work out. I wasn't supposed to be in those situations or around those people. The reason why those relationships didn't last, those situationships didn't last, the friendships, jobs, etc, is because it was to be temporary. I was supposed to go through it, learn the lesson and move on.  But because of my people pleasing, I stuck around longer than I should have. Crazy part is, at one time I had no issue with detachment, it was easy for me to move on, things didn't affect me like it would other people. I used to say all the time, oh I don't have a conscience. But I truly did, and it was always leading me in the right direction, I just stopped listening because I got caught up in the social norm. I got caught up in not wanting to be different, trying to be accepted in places I should have never been in. I was different and that's what made me special. Where I went wrong was trying not to be different.